Muslim dating provides a unique experience. Whether you are dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman, there are some facts you want to know. This information allows you to have an enjoyable experience while you also learn about another culture.
If you decide to follow your heart and date a Muslim person, then you will want to make sure you check out our list of best Muslim dating sites before you proceed.
Muslim Traditions and Culture
Before getting started with Muslim dating, you want to understand the basics regarding dating traditions and culture. Just remember that all Muslim people are different. This means that they might not all abide by these traditions, but it is still good to know this information.
When you are dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman, you will constantly face their traditions and culture. This is a good thing, and it can open up your world. However, because culture and traditions are such big parts of Muslim people, you need to know about them to succeed with Muslim dating.
Basic Information About Islam
When you are dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man, you should understand Islam’s basics. This is the religion they follow, and it will come up as you continue with Muslim dating.
In Arabic, Islam is a word that means “submission, peace, surrender, and commitment.” In general, by voluntarily surrendering to the divine will, one can attain complete peace. Allah is the god that those who follow Islam worship. The Quran is their holy book.
There are six primary beliefs in Islam:
- Belief in the angels
- Belief in Allah, the only God
- Belief in holy books that all of the prophets received
- Belief in the prophets that God sent
- Belief in life after death and the Day of Judgment
- Belief in divine decree
Muslim Art
As you get into Muslim dating, you will quickly discover the importance of Muslim art. The designs are often decorative, abstract, and floral. They are unique to Islamic architecture and art.
This type of art is devoid of animate. It is taboo to have portraiture. A lot of the art you see will be pieces that represent Allah. Other popular art includes Arabic calligraphy.
When it comes to Islamic architecture, the following features are common:
- Large courtyard
- Minarets
- Domes
- Central prayer halls
- Wall niche that shows the direction to Mecca
- Iwans to separate sections
- Fountains
- Arabic calligraphy
- Repetitive art forms
- Bright colors
Music
Islamic music is what is often heart. It is a type of devotional music that you can typically hear in public services. This type of music is present all over the world, including in various western countries.
Other traditional music includes different forms of North Indian and Arabic classical music. However, the country someone is from can determine their musical tastes. For example, Muslim people in western countries may listen to the same music as everyone else.
Muslim Habits and Traditions
When you are dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman, knowing some of the basics regarding their habits and traditions is important. The following are what you want to know before you start with Muslim dating:
- Before eating or drinking, they pronounce God’s name
- For drinking and eating, they use the right hand
- Muslims often greet each other by saying, “Assalaam Alaikum”
- After sneezing, it is common to be blessed
- The mouth, nose, and teeth should be kept clean
- After defecation and urination, the related body parts should be cleaned
These are just a few habits and traditions you might see when you are dating a Muslim person. Make sure that you respect these. Talk to your partner before engaging in them yourself to prevent offending.
Muslims in America
When you meet Muslim people in America, you will find that they are incredibly diverse. Some are very traditional, while others have assimilated almost completely into western culture.
When you meet a Muslim person in America, never assume anything about them. Ask them about their religion, their beliefs, and their traditions. This will prevent any possible confusion as you continue getting to know each other.
Muslim people are not just from the Middle East. People from all races and walks of life can follow the Islamic religion. They are present in all industries and areas of North America.
The bottom line here is never to assume. Most Muslim people are happy to have a meaningful conversation with you. On the first date, however, it is best to keep the conversation more casual.
Muslim Dating Rules
When it comes to Muslim dating, there are certain rules you’ll need to know for good measure. Ultimately, which rules followed depends on how traditional your partner is.The following are rules you might see when you are dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man:
- In the most traditional of partnerships, men and women cannot spend time alone together.
- They must have a chaperon to help them to resist temptation.
- Even after getting engaged, until the couple marries, they cannot spend time alone together.
- It is common for traditional Muslim people to go from courtship to engagement quickly.
When a strict and traditional Muslim man and woman are dating, they are not dating in the traditional sense. They are working to determine if they are compatible enough for marriage.
Now, this is with the most traditional of Muslim people. If a Muslim person is on a dating website, they are likely looking to date as you are used to in the western world. This includes alone time, going out, and spending your time getting to know each other.
When you are Muslim dating, one of the most important things to remember is that all Muslim people are individuals. Some of them will strictly follow Islam, while others will believe in Allah but will do so in their way.
When you meet a Muslim person interested in dating, you should get to know how strict and traditional they are. This will help you to determine the dating that you can expect.
You should prepare to meet your partner’s parents early when dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man. Family is significant, and they want to ensure that their parents approve of you once things start to get serious.
Western Muslims and Halal Dating
Muslims in western countries may not be as traditional as those brought up in eastern countries. The type of dating and relationships pursued are often referred to as Halal dating. It tends to be a more relaxed form of Muslim dating.
With Halal dating and dating in the western world, Muslim people are not waiting for their parents to arrange a marriage. They are dating just like most other western people. This means joining dating websites, meeting people from work or school, and scheduling dates with various people to see who they might be compatible with.
Muslims in the western world may not feel the same pressures as those in the eastern world when it comes to marriage. It is common for western Muslims to focus on their career and develop skills when they are young. They may also feel that they will eventually meet someone, so why not enjoy being single now.
If you are in a western country, when you start getting involved in Muslim dating with someone local, this is likely to be your experience. You will still find culture and tradition, but they likely will not be as strict.
When you are dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man following Halal dating, you may experience the following:
- They believe that Allah is who unites people.
- They meet people of the opposite gender to find a partner for marriage.
- The dates are in safe public places.
- On dates, both parties should dress modestly and appropriately.
- A family member can come along to help them to evaluate their date.
- Physical contact and flirting should be avoided.
Muslims Dating Non-Muslims
Dating isn’t an alien concept even to our young-aged Muslims. Growing up, girls and boys fantasize that they will get into a relationship, especially as soon as they hit their freshman year.
However, when it comes to Muslims dating Non-Muslims, things tend to become a little complicated for many reasons.
Muslims come with various religious restrictions when it comes to premarital relationships. It limits their physical contact with the counterpart, and Muslims are more focused on developing emotional intimacy in a premarital relationship than a physical one.
They might kiss or hug occasionally, but Muslims will not be open to the idea of developing a full-blown physical relationship with the other half before marriage. Still, most Non-Muslims would want to do it.
This is where things tend to become a little complicated for both people from either side of faith.
For young couples, however, the idea of dating isn’t as alien as you may think. They have a great way of balancing their religious obligations to the ones where their hearts are involved. But the fact that we call premarital relationships “dating” might trigger a lot of our elderly people since they are not willing to understand this aspect of the world of relationships doesn’t matter how innocent that relationship must be.
Islam doesn’t and has never forbidden love. According to various modern scholars, being in love with marriage expectations is a common kind of relationship in the modern world. If the girl and the boy don’t cross the sanctity of their religion, then there is seriously no harm in being with one another.
The same goes for dating Non-Muslims. While interfaith marriages aren’t allowed in Islam for women but if a girl has fallen in love with a man out of her faith and if he plans on turning Muslim in the future in hopes of getting married, then it is permissible.
Let’s look at these aspects in a little more detail below as we discuss each point individually.
Dating a Muslim Man as a Non-Muslim
Dating a Muslim man as a Non-Muslim isn’t haram, and neither is it forbidden. As long as the individual belongs to the four faiths mentioned in the Quran, they would never face an issue regarding their faiths if they plan to get married.
If you’re dating a Muslim man, then here a few things you should keep in mind,
- A Muslim man cannot spend time alone with you
- A Muslim man cannot marry you if you aren’t part of Kitabiyyah
- A Muslim cannot have a premarital sexual relationship with you
Dating a Muslim man isn’t that difficult, nor is it so easy. If you’re dating someone who is born and bred in the USA or any other foreign country for that matter, you will see how he has a completely different outlook on life as compared to men who are raised in Muslim countries.
Muslims aren’t known for dating. They get to know one another in an emotional premarital affair so they can marry the potential prospect. So that is where usually a line is drawn.
But when it comes to a Non-Muslim dating a Muslim man, many things vary in this aspect. For instance, it completely depends on the kind of relationship one is looking for.
For a Muslim man, it won’t be entirely possible to have a physical relationship before marriage. Another thing that a Muslim man might not be able to do is to satisfy his needs and desires, even in an oral manner.
It isn’t permissible in Islam to be sexually active before marriage. So if one belongs to Kitabbiyah and has emotionally connected to someone with the Islamic faith, it will be possible for her to get married to that man without changing her faith.
A Muslim man is born and raised with many love and expectations, especially in the eastern countries. Dating someone who belongs to this faith from the Eastern region will mean that you will have to respect his family and love them as your own. There isn’t any obligation on you for their keep asking. Still, you will have to understand that the man you have chosen for yourself has certain responsibilities that he must fulfill. You shouldn’t keep him from doing that.
Value his time and respect him if he chooses to spend some of his leisure periods with his family or by fulfilling his daily religious obligations. Don’t expect or ask him to spend on you like a responsibility. Appreciate his existence and standby him like a rock.
Dating a Muslim Woman as a Non-Muslim
When it comes to dating a Muslim woman as a Non-Muslim, lines are drawn and quite restricted, ones that have no notion of being flexible. It is prohibited for a Muslim woman to have an interfaith marriage. She cannot be wed out of faith, and if she does get married, in Islamic POV, that marriage will have no religious existence.
However, as far as dating goes, that is neither permissible nor forbidden. For a Non-Muslim man, if he has fallen in love with a Muslim woman and hopes to marry her someday, he will have to convert to the Islamic faith because only then will the marriage be possible from the religious perspective.
Also, dating a Muslim woman means that one can connect with her on an emotional level. Still, she won’t be allowed to indulge in physical activities with her other half before marriage. Although, Muslim women raised in Western countries have a different outlook on certain aspects than the women raised in Eastern countries. They are far more liberal and open to live-in relationships as compared to the women in the east.
They also might be open to the idea of getting married to a Non-Muslim man, but it won’t be permissible. It again depends completely upon the woman herself that she is willing to lose to date a Non-Muslim man how much she follows religion and the ties.
For a Non-Muslim, one thing that holds the most importance is being aware that dating a Muslim woman won’t involve indulging in sexual activities. You may connect with her emotionally and spiritually. Still, the ethical and right way to have a physical relationship is after marriage.
A Muslim woman, one that has been raised in the eastern countries, will be far more gender role oriented as compared to the girls raised in western countries. You will have to understand that these girls come and are raised with certain expectations of them. Though these expectations sometimes are horrendous, you cannot argue with them about it.
If they want to spend time with family or do something in a certain way, give them the respect and appreciation they deserve for making that choice. You will also have to respect their privacy and not ask them to expose themselves because you love them and want to see them.
This is something highly inappropriate, a deed that no Muslim woman should be made obliged to do. You will also have to respect their family and their religious obligations.
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Dating a Muslim During Ramadan
Have a Halal relationship means you’re sharing each and everything except for being sexually active.
During Ramadan, any fasting Muslim’s major priority is to abstain from eating, drinking, smoking, or being active in sexual activity. It also includes refraining from committing sins and being true to their faith.
Now, that includes abstaining from any haram relationship that they may have otherwise. During Ramadan, it must be essential for a person to maintain his/her sanctity and not come in contact with a Na-Mehram that may evoke sexual desires in them that they might not have control over.
Ramadan is a time where a lot of Muslims want to better themselves for good. That includes not committing any kind of sin and developing habits that are meant to last a lifetime. But if you happen to be someone who is outside of faith and doesn’t understand why this is how it is, it can leave you feeling dejected.
Here your male or female counterpart needs to educate you about their faith and how you both can grow into loving each other more.
Most people refrain from talking to their boyfriends or girlfriends during the time they fast because it may cause them to arouse, which will, in turn, cause their fast to nullify. This is a significant point to keep in mind.
One can engage in physical activities if married after their fast has completed before they begin the next one. For someone in a halal relationship, this would be the time to interact with their partners while making sure they don’t indulge in any offensive activities.
Dating during Ramadan also indicated that you could not indulge in any oral physical activities, i.e., masturbation.
This aspect of relationships and individual needs is a huge debate in itself. Still, as far as it is linked to dating, it isn’t permissible in any way. You will also have to respect their love for their religion and all its activities.
Ramadan is also that time of the year where you get more close to your family. So if your male or female partner wants to spend more time with their families, especially at dawn and dusk, then you must respect that.
Muslim Family Life
One of the biggest foundations of Muslim life is the family. In the Quran, traditional marriage is commonly discussed. This has the woman in the marriage caring for the home and the man as the breadwinner.
This does not mean that you and your Muslim partner must strictly abide by these traditions if you both agree to something different. For example, both of you might share the breadwinner and caretaker’s role, which is perfectly fine.
Muslim families are often very close, so when you are dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman, you will typically spend a lot of time with their family. There is a chance that you might not be immediately accepted if you do not follow the Islamic religion.
However, the Quran wants to see a bond of “affection and mercy” and “tranquility” between a wife and her husband. Because of this, as you continue to date, if your relationship is strong, you are likely to be accepted into the family, so be patient.
Expectations of Parents
Traditionally, Muslim parents are expected to raise their children as Muslims, be kind to them and provide for them. When a baby is born, it is common for Muslim parents to whisper a profession of faith into their ear, referred to as the Shahada.
In the western world, whether parents are expected to raise their children as Muslim varies. Some families are okay with the child learning about both parents’ religious beliefs if one parent is not Muslim.
When you are dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man, this is a conversation you will need to have early on. If you do not wish to convert to Islam, you and your partner must agree regarding religion in your home.
Expectations of Children
Muslim children’s expectations regarding the Quran are not much different from what anyone would expect from their children. Children are expected to respect their parents and be dutiful. It also commands gratitude for what their parents do for them.
Muslim Marriage and Divorce
Islam recommends that partners marry. Compared to the west, most of the fundamentals of marriage are the same. The one difference is that polygamy is allowed, and men can marry four women. However, it is rare to see Muslims practicing polygamy in western countries.
Divorce is allowed, and Islam recognizes that it can sometimes be necessary. Traditionally, the couple is asked to use a waiting period to ensure the wife is not pregnant before filing for a divorce.
Dating a Muslim Woman
When you are dating a Muslim woman, there are a few facts to know. Muslim women prefer direct men. If you like her, you should show her.
Flirting and using tongue-in-cheek humor goes a long way when trying to get a Muslim woman’s attention. If she likes you, she will not be shy about spending time alone with you. While subtler than flirting, it gets the point across that she is interested.
How to Date a Muslim Girl
Muslim women may be more traditional compared to other women. For example, they may be more likely to follow traditional gender roles. Because of this, you should practice chivalry when you are out with a Muslim woman.
Women want to make their men happy when it comes to intimacy. However, if you are dating a very traditional Muslim woman, there is a chance that she will not engage in sex before you two are married. If you are seeking a long-term relationship with her, this must be respected.
The following are additional tips that can be helpful when you are dating a Muslim woman:
- Please do your research on her country of origin because some countries are more relaxed regarding Islam and its practices than others.
- Be respectful of her time if she engages in prayer five times per day.
- During Ramadan, do not ask for a date, as this can appear disrespectful.
- Remember that Muslim people do not eat pork or drink alcohol.
- Know that many Muslim women date to find a partner for marriage, so casual dating is often not appealing to them.
- Respect their privacy and decisions with regards to their lives and their families
- Don’t force them to indulge in sexual activities, whether physical or oral
Dating a Muslim Man
Before getting started with dating a Muslim man, there are a few things you should know. Muslim men can be very traditional, so expect chivalry when you are dating. He does not hold doors and drive because he thinks you are not capable, but he respects you.
What to Expect When Dating a Muslim Man?
Know what you want when you start dating. Muslim men are traditional, but they do respect women who think for themselves. Do not be afraid to disagree or engage in lighthearted debate to learn from each other.
If he is very traditional, he may not engage in sex before marriage. However, if his view of his religion is more casual, he may. Once you have been dating for a little while, this is a topic you will have to discuss to ensure you both are on the same page.
Muslim men are typically not as slow when it comes to getting engaged. If you are serious about your relationship and want to take the next step, talk about it. You will not likely date for several years before he pops the question if he wants to marry you.
The following are additional tips that can be helpful when you are dating a Muslim man:
- Be respectful of his time if he engages in prayer five times per day.
- During Ramadan, do not ask for a date, as this can appear disrespectful.
- Remember that Muslim people do not eat pork or drink alcohol.
- He will not expect you to convert to Islam while you are dating, but it is important to learn about his religion.
- Learn to see his way of living and ask for what he expects of you
- Do not force them to marry you if they aren’t ready to
- Asking for irrational gifts and expecting him to spend on your also isn’t appreciated; one should refrain from that
- Don’t make him do your chores
- Respect his privacy and make sure you don’t interfere in his personal decisions
- Let him have his time with family and don’t breathe down his neck
Sex and Intimacy
When you start with Muslim dating, sex and intimacy is a topic you want to discuss. When you are dating a Muslim woman or dating a Muslim man, they may believe in no sex before marriage. However, those who have grown up in the western world may not be as strict with this.
Traditionally, sex is ritualized in Islam. The following are common traditional elements:
- The man reads a prayer before he and his partner engage in intercourse. This is to protect any child who the act may conceive.
- Before sex, an ablution should be done for the man. Across his head and face, moistened hands should be passed. This is a type of sacred cleansing.
- After sex, both partners must use water to rinse their genitals.
- After sex, the man should lie in bed instead of getting up right away.
- Islam does not expressively forbid any specific positions. Still, oral and anal sex are prohibited since they do not contribute to conceiving a child.
- The days preferred to have sex include nights of Shaitan, Friday afternoons, and Friday nights.
Sex Before Marriage Islam
Sex before marriage in Islam is strictly forbidden. In Islam, men and women are advised to dress modestly to refrain from committing fornication or adultery. Sex is said to be a gift from Allah and should only be between a man and a married woman.
“Let those who find not the wherewithal for marriage keep themselves chaste until God gives them the means.” Qur’an 24:33
Most Muslim families are known for arranged marriages. This involves the families finding a suitable match for their boy or the girl based on compatibility. This way, lustful feelings can be avoided and ensure adultery is never committed.
Islam is obvious on sex before marriage. It is an offense punishable by death, and one who commits it will rot in hellfire and face Allah’s wrath.
Muslim Stereotypes
When it comes to Muslim dating, you must know what the stereotypes are to get past them. If you believe any of these stereotypes, it can greatly interfere with your relationship.
Terrorism and Islam
Unfortunately, some people equate Islam with terrorism. Yes, some terrorists practice Islam, but you cannot generalize an entire race of people by this.
Muslims Dislike Christians and Jews
This is an unfortunately common stereotype that is just not true. When you are getting into Muslim dating, you must know that this is a myth. If you are Jewish or a Christian, you can date Muslim people without a problem.
Muslim People Do Not Believe in God or Jesus
This is not true. God is who they believe in, but he is referred to as “Allah.” In Arabic, “Allah” translates to “God.” As for Jesus, the Quran actually mentions him more than Muhammad, but in the Quran, Jesus is not the son of God, but he is instead a prophet.
Muslim Superstitions
When it comes to Muslim dating, you must understand some of the superstitions associated with the culture. These are often related to someone’s country of origin and not just a general Muslim superstition.
Before you start dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman, take a little time to learn about the following:
- The Evil Eye is something that many Muslims believe in
- Snakeskins may be burned to chase off evil spirits in a home.
- Some Muslim teachers will not grade students’ work using a red pen since this ink color symbolizes blood.
- Fortune telling may bring evil; however, some Muslim people may engage in fortune-telling without feeling the risk of evil in Turkey.
- An eclipse shows Allah’s power, so many Muslim people will not be outside during one, especially Muslim people from Egypt.
- Certain groups of Muslim people worldwide believe that specific amulets and charms hold magic forces and special powers.
- Dreams may convey the messages of devils and spirits.
Since the person’s country of origin largely determines the superstitions they may believe, you should get to know their background. This will help you to narrow down the superstitions you might see as you continue dating Muslim people.
Conclusion
With this comprehensive guide to Muslim dating, you will find it easier to get started dating people from this culture. Knowing the facts ensures that you can truly appreciate Muslim people.
Just remember that when you are dating a Muslim man or dating a Muslim woman that while there are cultural things to respect, you must also remember that they are individuals too.
If you haven’t already, please check out our list of best Muslim dating sites so you can make the best decision. If we missed anything, please comment below. Good luck!
I like you and want you as my wife